November 21, 2024

If I could send the iPad to the kitchen to make a diet-worthy sandwich for me, I would.  Alas, even Steve Jobs hasn’t gotten that close to living the Jetson’s life.  So I just asked the iPad about sandwiches.  More specifically, I downloaded a couple of cookbooks after I realized the sandwich I’d just made had about 350 calories despite the fact that I’d done everything to diet it up right down to the extra thin bread and the fake mayo.

It’s a sad diet that sucks the joy of a grilled cheese out of you.

And now I have cookbooks in my Kindle for iPad.  I haven’t read any actual recipes yet.  In an ordinary cookbook, I would have just flipped over to the middle and looked around for something good to eat.  In the digital version I thought I’d better read the introduction while I was there.  Maybe cookbooks aren’t for Kindle.  Flipping here and there seems to be a necessary element of cookbookery.

I feel like calling Nicholas Carr right now to tell him that Kindle is killing my non-linear reading habits.  I don’t even skip the ends of novels to find out if the hero’s love interest is still alive in the last chapter anymore.  I doubt I’ll ever make it to the sandwich section of a cookbook I feel compelled to read in order.  Another collateral loss for me in the diet zone.

This conundrum reminds me, though, of a time when I heard on the radio about a “redneck sandwich” contest.  You were supposed to send in recipes for the most rednecked up sandwiches you could think of (excluding bologna and spam by virtue of being way too obvious).  I think my recipe was for a fried squirrel salad sandwich.  I would never consider eating any part of that, but it seemed like the ultimate redneck choice to me.

The most disgusting sandwich eating I’ll actually admit to is a pickle and mustard sandwich.  I used to eat them.  I don’t know why.  As a child, I also ate mayonnaise sandwiches and sugar sandwiches (but not mayonnaise and sugar sandwiches).

None of those meet my current needs for quick and easy meals that conform to The Diet.

I think I might start making hummus sandwiches with that silly thin bread.  If I dip the bread in some garlicky olive oil first, that might even be good.

Favorite vegetarian diet-worthy sandwich, anyone?

1 thought on “The iPad is learning to cook (The Diet, Day 11)

  1. Not a veggie … But the orowheat double- fiber bread is good. It (the bread) even doubles as a passable bagel. (I’m remembering the ham & cream cheese bagel from the bagel shop.)

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